COLUMNIST
By Silviano Barbosa
------------ CAZAR IN GOA -----------
A close look at the old fashioned weddings in Goa
There is no happier and more ecstatic moment in one's life-in this world than the day one gets married. From times immemorial, man and woman have both craved and yearned for a consummate love and heavenly bliss. And this institution of marriage with age-old traditions still survives in Goa.
A marriage in Goa is a long drawn out process. It starts with a soirikar, who is forever scouting the villages for prospective brides and grooms. He scans their background, status, caste, pigmentation, occupation, assets, and education, matches the couples and makes contact with their parents. Later he gets them together at a pre-arranged meeting place. And if they like each other, there is a promise of a marriage and the .soirikar claims his commission. Then their parents discuss matters such as dowry and dennem, and a date for the wedding.
Now the real tasks begin. You go to Church to talk to Padre Vigar. He asks lot of questions on Cathechism and you better brush up on your doutrina, otherwise your letter will never be read in the church three times. "Devache kurpen cazar zata ...". Next you make arrangements for the wedding, the band, get all your certidaos in order for the civil marriage formalities, arrange for a pig, and build fire-place outside the house to cook pulau, sorpatel. and doce. Then paint your house white, go to the shetti (gold-smith) to order custom gold jewelry. Don't forget to get all your savings for the dowry and the furnishings for the dennem or arrange to get a big loan for the expenses or go to all your relatives and friends for contributory loans and possibly even the village Bhattkar to mortgage your ancestral home.
The bride looks forward to the day she will get married. But first, she has to go to her maternal uncle's house (mamaguer) where she drinks water from the well and her uncle offers her chuddo, a bunch of multi-coloured glass bangles on her both hands, a sign that she is now engaged. Next comes the mudi, to celebrate the engagement, when a priest will bless the gold rings. Now as she is really engaged, doce and dalli (sweet rice pudding) will be distributed throughout the village in a black earthen pot with a doulo (coconut ladle). Only a couple weeks left for the big wedding. Time for the great bridal dress. The best tailors are hired to do customized stitching for the bride as well as the bridesmaid and new dresses for close relatives.
Only a couple days left now and the closest relatives from far off villages come running to help the household with their horde of children and the bridal house becomes a palace of relatives and children running around making noises and having fun and no school for about two weeks. The cooking is now done outside on the fireplace in big burkulo and kunnim (pots), a collso of fennim is always ready. And after rosary at night, they eat, drink and later they go for a deep slumber on ator (a large bamboo mat) in the midst of a kanni (story). Parents visit houses in the neighbourhood for an informal wedding invitation. If no one is home, they stick a tallo (a stalk of leaves) in the main door key-hole (message waiting). By default the entire village is invited, no cards, no gate-crashers, all guests.
Now two days to go. Bride and groom go to the city hall for the civil marriage and after that they go to a restaurant for celebration. Friends and relatives gather to kill a pig, cut meat for sorpotel, hadd-mas, ross-mass buch, and kalliz.(bones, roast, tripe and liver) Kids take the poskotto (bladder) and blow it and tie it and play with it like a balloon and later eat the fried pork rind, the fat remnants.(Cholesterol was not invented yet). Neighbourhood womenfolk are busy helping with the cooking and doce, men are helping to put up a big mattou (mega tent) The mattou is draped with white decorated sheets. The chairs and tables and the band stage is all set. The dance floor is all sand filled with jack-fruit leaves for easy dancing.. The village chief sets up her wares. The soda machine is set with old soda bottles with marble at the top. Cases of cerveja St. Paulo Girl beer are purchased for special guests like Padre Vigar and Bhattkar and other special guests.
On the eve of wedding day, there is bhikream jevonn, a big lunch for the beggars, consisting of big pieces of meat, vegetable and fish served on a potravoli (leaves plate) on the floor, in memory of the dearly departed. And on this day, you get saguades, like fish gantonn, kellim-guellavo (gift baskets of fish and bananas) from your well-wishers and relatives that you have to pay back later in kind. Later at night they perform ross, a ceremony to bathe the bride/groom with coconut milk, in unison with the singing of verses in Konkanni in praise of the bride/groom and their relatives.
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Comments
Merlyn
I enjoyed reading your article "CAZAR IN GOA". You have enclosed all the details about our Goan weddings, very interesting. Looking forward to read your next article. Wishing you Sir Silviano Barbosa, all the success.
From,
Merlyn Almeida.
[Cuncolim/New York]
Franky Furtado
Very nostalgic piece.Reminded me of my own wedding back in Goa.More than me my children enjoyed the read , while me doing the explanation.Radiogoa, please publish more articles like these.thanks
Julio Fernandes
Dear Mr. Barbosa,
Your article: CAZAR IN GOA, is a nostalic but incomplete read!!
The missing nostalgia was, IN EACH PARTY'S HOUSE,BEFORE THEY LEAVE TO GO TO THE CHURCH AND DRESSED IN THEIR THEIR FULL WEDDING CLOTHES, THE BRIDE AND GROOM STAND BENEATH THEIR HOUSE ALTAR (alter)AND RECEIVE BLESSINGS AND LITTLE MONEY FROM THEIR PARENTS, SIBLINGS, RELATIVES AND NEIGHBORS. SOMETIMES THERE IS JOYFUL CRYING GOES ON.
From Julio Fernandes from Parra, Goa and now from Maryland, USA
Armand Rodrigues
Silviano, a fellow-writer from Canada, takes liberties with the main medium, but certainly livens his narrative with interspersed Konkanim and Portuguese words that would strike a chord with those who understand the lingos. He aptly takes one through the protocol of Goan weddings of yesteryear, which I witnessed in my youth, but avoided when I took the plunge abroad ! Keep it up Silviano !
Armand Rodrigues